Being A Mean Girl

I used to hang out with the guys a lot. Girls were just too much work - there always seemed to be drama and someone who would stab you in the back. When I was in grade school I had a group of girlfriends who eventually turned on me because I had tried to play their game and gotten catty. I ended up not having friends for a whole week - which in kids’ terms is an eternity. I would just sit outside the portables and wait for recess to be over. After that whole debacle, I resolved to never be like that again. I realized that if I acted like that I would never have any girl friends. I did try to change my ways, but over the years I started to gravitate more towards the guys. I decided that guys were easier - they told you to your face if they didn’t like you. Either way, you always knew where you stood.

Fast-forward to the end of high school and it happened all over again. I was part of a tight-knit girl group who all got along because we were the girls who got along better with guys and didn’t like how cliquey other girls were. We all stuck together, but we were always nice to other girls coming in or any girls who happened to be dating our guy friends. We just let each other be ourselves and accepted it because we loved each other unconditionally. Then after high school, I moved in with one of the girls. She was in a bad relationship with a guy who was abusive and cheating on her and she didn’t deserve it. Night after night she would come to my room and cry because she was so upset about how he was treating her. One night I finally told her that he wasn’t good enough for her and I thought she should leave him. The next day they both moved out of the house we were all living in together. I was shocked. I think she must have seriously considered it and then told him what I’d said, because after that she stopped talking to me altogether and all our friends completely cut me out.

I was in shambles. I had had such an amazing support group and had so much fun with these girls and now I couldn’t talk to any of them. For years after that I didn’t trust any girls. And it wasn’t just friends - my mother was hard to trust, and so was my sister. Truly, I didn’t understand girls. To this day it’s hard for me to be friends with girls because I’m always afraid something like that will happen again - but I have made a few good female friends over the years and the ones I do have I cherish and love so much.

I wish females would be nicer to each other. Life is not always about jealousy or competition. It’s not always about whether some other girl has an eye on your partner. What’s important is being strong as a sex and standing together! Honestly, regardless of gender, if you have girls or guys around you that you can’t trust, then get them out of your life. They’re not worth it. And female to female interaction is so important. Social media and society and (some) men are so hard on women every day. Women who like to tear each other down are just enabling a society that wants us to have no self-respect.

We are strong beings. Whether we choose to our not, we can literally make humans in our bodies! We should be killing it in this world. As women we are beautiful, smart, strong, and loving (when we want to be). And I think almost every woman has a motherly instinct that we should learn to tap into more often. I love females as a whole and I love being female but I just wish that other girls could understand how important it is that we treat each other with the respect and love that we all deserve.